The Four Incremental Steps Of My Growth In ACIM
~ Donald L. O’Dell
First, I need to comprehend what the Course is explaining. This world is a dream and I am the dreamer. What I see as reality is simply my perception of things, which is no more valid than anyone else’s perception of things. I am constantly on the defensive (or on the attack) when people challenge my perception. I am not what I think. I am not a body. I cannot – through an act of my will power – perceive things as a loving Son of God. My role is to be a savior of the world by being a partner with Jesus the Christ – offering Forgiveness and the Atonement to all. However, that is up to the Holy Spirit, not me. All I can do is acknowledge that the world I see is my perception, forgive myself and my perceptions, and then ask the Holy Spirit for another way to perceive the situation. This process – Forgiveness/Atonement – is what I’m to be all about.
Intellectually, I think I understand the first step (above). Now, I have found myself to be very attuned to when others are defending and justifying their perceptions. I try to notice this in a very non-judgmental way, often playing all sorts of mind games to convince myself that I am not judging people, only noticing and observing. But I’m judging and I know it. Back to the first step, again.
Thirdly, I am moving to understand that what is really important is not how astute I have become in spotting the ego-centric perceptions of others, but recognizing the “reality“ I attribute to my perceptions (this is the if-you-spot-it-you-got-it syndrome I learned in AA.) – especially those I’ve masked in an aura of ACIM-approved perceptions. Of course, there are no ACIM-approved perceptions – that’s just the slickness of my rapid-fire, steel-trap ego mind. Back to the first step.
Fourthly, I am to begin living in the Now – experiencing the reality of the Son-of-Godness in everyone I meet. These encounters, called Holy Encounters in ACIM, have been very brief but very intense. They are orchestrated by the Holy Spirit, not conjured up by me.
However, I spend most of my time moving from 1 to 2 and back again. Every once in a while, I touch base with 3 – but it is usually very brief, then I am back to 1 again. I certainly do not live in the state of 4. And, trust me, I never let myself forget that. I get really frustrated with myself a lot. My ego keeps telling me I shoulda/coulda/woulda all sorts of things if I were really spiritual. As a result, I find myself getting – not just upset with me – very upset with others. My serenity goes in the toilet and I’m back to…..progress not perfection.
Although this message is really for me, thanks for listening, and – as always – feel free to forward this message to your friends, family, and those accompanying you on your spiritual journey.
Blessings, Don
March 28, 2024
